Death is a mystery. Simple and to the point. We look around and don't ask the question but it lingers in our mind like the syrup trail down the neck of your bottle of Aunt Jemima. What does happen? If we knew the answer it would be over for most of us. And murder wouldn't be so ... bad. But we don't. There are just some things we don't want the answer to such as what is inside an Oscar Meyer wiener. We want to know but not enough to actually find out. If a man was given the freedom to make any choice and allowed to reverse it and retain the memory of it, death would be at the top of the list for most of us. What happened to Grandpa or my sister Suzie? Is the old butcher down the street really at rest? We really do want to know but it's not something that we're willing to experiment finding the answer to. Of all the possibilities existing for us, the one certainty we face is death. We try to ignore or we center our lives around it. The first thought we don't have upon waking up each day is how many hours we lost on our voyage of mortality. We simply think about what lies ahead and our best (or worst) path to travel that day. Normally, we don't wake up and think "One day closer to not breathing anymore. I hope I can utilize every minute of this day in a way the benefits humanity so I'm not perceived as someone who wasted his/her life." Nope, for most of us it's the thought that we'd rather sleep a little longer or I slept too much. "And no one else put any coffee on? Crap!" That's life for most of us. There are a few, in a moment of reality with a close loved one facing a disease or imprisonment, that hear life knocking at the door yelling at them "Hey! It's one more day closer to the end." or "This is the day your mom's gonna die." But then after the crisis ends life is resumed and they head back to normalcy. So the question is, ultimately, should normalcy be the norm? We don't stop and think about our loved ones enough, do we? We see the clothes on the floor and it irritates us and our fondness for them is just a little, well, ... less. Or we hear our spouse snoring and find them a little, well, ... repulsive. And how many times have we put them on hold on the phone or thought - I'll call 'em back in an hour or tomorrow because something like work or your television show was on? Yes, we don't think that the "impossible" will happen today. We just live a normal life and try our best to live "normal". Because death and goodbyes are painful. But not only is death a possibility, it is an eventuality. There is no hiding place or trickery to help us allude the reality. And that hinders our spirit a little, doesn't it? To look at the co-worker and try to imagine no more time with them. Or see the clerk at the store and wondering why we're so scared to get a little closer to them. And ultimately it comes around to this - emotional gambling. If I invest my feelings or show myself (the real me) to this person are they worth the "Goodbye"? And I think that's what every relationship is based upon. It's not the initial introduction or the messy intertwining of humanity that stops us from getting to know strangers better. No, it's the finality of the goodbye that stops us. I think of this when I wonder how someone could be so involved in the tragedy involving a stranger such as a celebrity or media star thrust in the limelight. We seem to care more about a Trayvon murdered in Florida rather than a elder living two houses down from us. It's all about the emotional commitment and the final goodbye. And it's just a little sad. Our neighbor deserves better. We all do. My name is Rueuhy and I approve this blog.
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