Predictions for 2015

A.P. News outlet Friday April 13, 2015 "What is possible? That's what the guys over at that technology place two blocks over from that McDonalds where Terry Jo got sick that one time are asking themselves. And boy are they not disappointing their fans. From the same guys that brought you the usb connector and the @ symbol for emails, the creativity and innovation is flowing faster than Don Johnson in pursuit of gangsters on the high seas off the coast of Miami. (R.I.P. bad gangsters. You were useful in the 80's but now drug smuggling is too cliche' for the western world.) From the halls of The Tech Palace comes the biggest announcements for the summer of 2015. If you've been waiting for the latest breakthroughs in biochemical interface with your smart hardware interaction technology you will not be disappointed. The unveiling of the spinal input terminal was expected but advocates for several human rights groups are calling for the federal government to step in, once again, and place a hold on the research. The public response for such a connection has been remarkably positive for the latest advancements in connectivity with their technology but Johan Williamson, the PR director for PETH (People for the Ethical Treatment of Humans), quickly denounced this new technology as the next step in the de-evolution and safety of the human race. Mr. Williamson was quoted as saying, "When we make this permanent connection with our devices we have gone too far. Without the government's intervention, there will be no boundaries in the takeover of mankind by the engineers of scientific research. Already powerful, who will stop them in their ability to achieve invincibility even the government cannot stop? This is beyond science fiction. This is the beginning of the end for humanity." The North American Allegiance Prime Minister, Michelle LaVaugn Robinson, the former wife of the former United States last President Barack Obama, said that "We cannot stop the progress technology has strived for all these years. It is in our short-sightedness that we can become stagnated in our development of science and take steps backwards rather than achieve greatness. Science will verify the ability of man to achieve even greater heights of creativity and diversity within our universe. Only a fool would want to go back to the days of just talking and texting on devices which can do so much more for our species." The Secretary General of the United Nations, Inc. was quick to downplay the political fallout. Hillary Clinton, speaking at Tuesday's morning session, wasted no time in sharply disputing the latest announcements. "When the world falls victim to organizations such as Peth, and their fear-mongering voice known as Mr. Williamson, we are held hostage to our own fears and our true capability will never be known. If such technology is achievable then advancement in that field of research can only culminate in the benefit of humanity as a whole. Fear should not dominate our ability to reason through this." The ex-husbands of Clinton and Robinson were not available for comment during their latest peace-keeping mission in Sydney but are expected to speak in favor of the technology. It was the latest medical device to come out of The Tech Palace that was given credit for saving William Clinton's life for the fourth time and he has pledged 30 million North American Marks towards future research. It has been largely credited to the Clinton/Obama political think tank that brought together the former North American countries into the present coalition known as The North American Allegiance. In other announcements by The Tech Palace a new energy source is being developed very similar to photo-synthesis we see in the plant world. Tony Jobs, the head of research and development, reports that the previously unknown element jextonite has been found to be successful in generating power within humans and can power external devices. "What we are seeing is the possible end of batteries and external charging units for our electronics. If our research holds true, it may be possible within ten years to see the culmination of human/technology interface beyond what was even dreamed of within the past five years. Human touch itself will power devices and their will be unlimited potential possibilities for this new bio-chemical technology. Dare I say, it is a new field within science itself." Also, The Tech Palace is seeing possible advancements in the nana-technology areas of development. Tony Jobs had this to say on possible developments. "In the area of nano-technology we are seeing great advancements in the genetic reconstruction field. When a man lost an eye a century ago, a wooden or glass replacement was made or an eye patch was worn. What we see possible, through the latest breakthroughs, nano-bots will effectively be introduced into a victim's body and with a DNA map, rebuild the effected areas of damage. An eye can be rebuilt from within utilizing a person's cell growth process. With input from the nano's within a person, the brain will correlate information with the dna instructions from the nano-bots and begin the healing. We are seeing the possibility of the end of transplants and surgeries by the year 2050." Johan Williamson was quick to point out the dangers of this technology and demanded further intervention from the government. Michelle LaVaughn Robinson was quick to make this statement. "After the loss of her ability to walk due to spinal cord injuries endured during the December 2013 terrorist attack on the old White House, Natasha has found new hope in this news and I would be less than a mother and leader to defame such news." And that's it for this Friday morning in our A.P. Tech report. Sally Johnson will return next week and discuss the recent order to exhume the body of Steve Jobs. Good day. My name is Rueuhy and I approve this blog.